Church Shopping

“I’ve always been asked, ‘What is your favorite car?’ and I’ve always said, ‘The next one.'”

Carroll Shelby, Car Designer

Some love the thrill of buying a new car while others feel it’s a tedious, painful process, preferring instead a root canal. But even if it’s a hassle, there is something to buying a car that is exciting! It’s the feeling of getting a change of pace, whether a new car or just new-to-you.

For all of us who have gone car shopping, you know the drill. You go into a few car dealerships and are greeted by happy salespeople who tell you all the great things about their cars and current deals. Then, the questions flow to find out what you are looking for in a car. Do you want something sporty and youthful? Or would you rather be practical with a pickup? Maybe you long for a trip back to the good-ole-days with a classic? No, wait, how about the latest and greatest with all the safety features? There’s no right or wrong, just figuring out what you really want in your next vehicle.

Then you hit the lot while the salesperson picks out a few models he thinks would suit you. Sitting behind the wheel in the first one, it feels a little stiff, a little worn out. You turn on the radio and flinch at the static in the speakers. “Maybe I should try out another,” you say to the salesman. He proudly leads you something new and modern. “This one has a lots of options to choose from: tons of bells and whistles,” he says to you as you slip into its comfy seat. It feels really good and you close your eyes and imagine driving it around. So sporty while eco-efficient, these are all the trend to drive around. But, sigh, you can’t carry much in it and it only has two seats. Reviewing the features you had in mind, you decide to move on. Weekend after weekend you keep trying different dealerships, talking to more overly-optimistic people wanting to sell you something you will be stuck in for the next five to ten years. Makes it sound like a prison sentence doesn’t it?

It’s like choosing a church

Choosing a church is a lot like buying a car. You look through the phone book and pick a denomination you feel would be a good choice. You go there the next Sunday and are greeted by happy ushers who would love to tell you all the best parts about their fellowship and show you around. They hand you a brochure and lead you into the main area where you slip into the seat. “A little stiff, but somewhat comfortable,” you say to yourself. You look through the brochure and think if this is a good fit. Oh look, they have a place for the kids in the back with lots of room, and even a T.V. with a Blu-Ray player. The lights dim and the music starts. More modern than you were hoping for, but the songs are the same as the contemporary worship station on the radio. You look around and you notice people seem generally happy with their choice, and you feel good to be there. The owner of the “dealership” comes out and gives a good message about their building, what they do there and how they can help you get from one place to another and further down the road. You are greeted by more happy people, and in the end, as good as it was, you think to yourself, “Perhaps I’ll try another, just to be sure.”

There are so many things to consider when selecting a Christian fellowship that you want to call home and the people you want to call family. It’s a big decision especially when you know you’ll be there for the next five to ten years. You think about the last church that you departed and the reasons why. Maybe it was because:

• You didn’t like how Children’s Church is being run or their curriculum
• You didn’t like the music, whether the style of how it was played
• You were hurt by someone or felt convicted by the message every Sunday
• You wanted a bigger church with more options, services, or programs
• The people just seemed too cliquey

But what do people look for when deciding which exit to get off?

• What’s the music like at this church?
• How big is the congregation?
• What’s the children’s ministry look like at this fellowship?
• How long are the services each Sunday?

The list goes on and on; the reasons for attending and the excuses for not. When choosing a place to fellowship with other believers; calling it home, the question is not, “Is this church right for me?” The question we really need to be asking is…

“Am I right for this church?”

Let’s think about this; is church supposed to serve us, or are we supposed to serve in it as we serve Christ? As we seek a fellowship to get planted in, we should rethink our motivations from trying to change it, to reshaping ourselves. When looking for a place to grow, as yourself these questions:

• Do I share the same heart for their vision, misssion, and ministry?
• Am I committed to the word of God like the leadership of this church I am vetting?
• Can this church use my gifts and talents to further their ministry?
• Am I a Spirit-filled believer already committed to spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ through my own daily personal evangelism, prayer, and service to others?
• Would I be an asset to this church I am seeking, and if not, what do I need to do to get there?
• What ministries can I help at this fellowship I am visiting?
• Would my character be helpful or hurtful for the fellowship at this church?

The focus is on God, Jesus Christ, the gospel, and the ministry God has given us. The focus is not on my needs as a person looking for a fellowship, but how I can give of myself to the fellowship for the sake of Jesus Christ and the gospel. Are my character traits, gifts, talents, insights, and personality a good fit for what they are already doing? Instead of thinking, “Can I see myself joining here?” it should be, “Where can they see me fitting in?” I am not considering churches—they are considering me. If choosing a church fellowship is not like buying a car, then why do we make it seem like it is? Why do some pastors and church staff bend over backwards to help accommodate those who are on the fence?

Some people go through life never finding the right church. But is there a perfect church? According to who? By all intents and purposes, yes. The church in 1 Thessalonians chapter 1 is a great example. Paul commends them for their work of faith, labor of love, and patience of the hope of Christ. They became followers of Paul and of the Lord, received the gospel in affliction and joy. They repented and turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God. They had tremendous spiritual growth and by them the gospel spread everywhere. They were a great example of a Spirit-led, powerful church. They were team players — not spectators.

Not to mention the church of Philadelphia (Revelation 3:7-13) and the church of Smyrna (Revelation 2:8-11) where the Lord Jesus commended them that even though they had little strength in enduring trials, they kept Christ’s word, persevered, and never denied the Lord. They never abandoned the Lord, even though they faced intense persecution. These were the two churches which never received criticism from the Lord. They were faithful, fruitful, and full of life.

In my humble opinion

So, instead of asking, “Is there a good church out there for me?” We should be asking, “Am I willing, ready, and able to be a part of it?” Are you willing to sacrifice yourself, your time and your finances to it? Are you ready to share the gospel and help build and grow it; not by sheep-shifting and gaining numbers from other churches, but seeking the lost and discipling those who are recently converted? Are you continually learning, growing and preparing to teach others what you have learned? Are you able to teach, to be used by God in a way to advance His kingdom and not yours? But if you are not, why not?

The church I have attended for over twenty years is finally busting at the seams. That is a great problem to have. But why? I think we are loving people more because we have more resources to give. And we have more resources to give because the people are giving of their time, talent, and treasure. But, for the most part we’ve always done the same thing—teach the Bible verse-by-verse, book-by-book. Hungry sheep go where there is food. At my fellowship we focus on spiritual nourishment and feeding the flock with biblically Christ-centered teaching throughout the week. It’s not that we are doing anything new, it’s that people are coming because they’re tired of the clowns behind the pulpit prioritizing entertainment over truth. They’re starving.

But, unfortunately, there are those who never find the right church for them. Like Carroll Shelby, they never really commit to finding one and are always on the lookout for something better to fit their needs. In the end they think the whole process is futile, and decide to shop online. No annoying salespeople to talk to, they can watch in their pajamas and browse without leaving home.