Why Am I Not Happy as a Christian?

It is important to remember that as Christians, we all struggle with sin and negative thoughts at times. It is a part of our sinful, fallen, human nature. However, it is critical to hold onto the truth of God’s Word and His promises.

Salvation is a gift

First, salvation is not based on feelings, emotions, or our own efforts and ability to be perfect. It is a gift of God through faith in Jesus Christ (Ephesians 2:8-9). We are saved by grace and not works; but at the same time, we are God’s workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them (Ephesians 2:10). Our good works don’t get us into heaven, but they play a role in God’s individual plan for our lives that He receives glory through them. 

Stand firm in God’s Word

Second, when negative thoughts and doubts arise, it is important to combat them with the truth of Scripture. The Bible tells us as Christians we are sealed with the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 1:13-14) and that nothing can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39). We are given the weapons and armor of God to be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might, not ours, to stand against the lies of the devil, principalities, powers, rulers of darkness, and spiritual hosts of wickedness in heavenly places (Ephesians 6:10-13). If you look at the section of the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-20) what is a word that pops up frequently? Stand. The word stand occurs four times in ten verses. That’s almost half. That’s a lot. We are told to stand as Christians. To stand firm, immoveable, and when we’ve done all that we can do to stand, we stand some more, but all in God’s strength, not ours. The weapons God gives us are in Ephesians 6:14-20: 

1. Gird our waist with truth. 
2. Put on the breastplate of righteousness. 
3. Shod our feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace. 
4. Take up the shield of faith to quench the fiery darts (lies) of the enemy. 
5. Put on the helmet of salvation to protect our minds and thoughts. 
6. And hold the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God

We are also told to pray always, be watchful with perseverance, and proclaim the gospel boldly as we should. You want to get the devil back for all the rotten things he’s ever done to you and the people you care about? That’s how you do it. But remember, it is God’s fight, not ours. We are just told to stand with our armor on. 

Believe what you learned

One overlooked thing in this section though that people miss is the word, finally, in Ephesians 6:10. David Guzik points this out: 

“This comes at the end of the letter — a letter in which Paul has carefully established our place in Jesus, and then the basics of the Christian walk. This is his last section dealing with that walk. For Paul to write finally here means that he speaks that we are to stand in light of all he has previously said [in Ephesians].

• In light of all that God has done for you.
• In light of the glorious standing you have as a child of God.
• In light of His great plan of the ages that God has made you part of.
• In light of the plan for Christian maturity and growth He gives to you.
• In light of the conduct God calls every believer to live.
• In light of the filling of the Spirit and our walk in the Spirit.
• In light of all this, there is a battle to fight in the Christian life.” (Guzik)

Think about and all of these points and how God has done amazing things in time’s past for you. Read through David Guzik’s commentary on Ephesians 6 in Blue Letter Bible (http://blb.sc/00FS3g). It’s rich with theology that will help you in this area as it helps me also. 

Seek fellowship and encouragement from a local church

Third, seek support and encouragement from other believers. Surround yourself with a community of Christians from your local church who can provide guidance, prayer, and accountability. If you don’t have a church, I recommend a Calvary Chapel (https://calvarychapel.com/church-locator/). They are all over the world and you can probably find them where you live. They teach through the Bible verse-by-verse in context and never miss anything.

It is critically important to be discipled by a stronger Christian man (or woman if you are a lady) who is willing to help and guide you through life to be more like Christ. God created us to need each other, and to be strengthened and equipped for ministry by the church (Ephesians 4:11-13).

Jesus didn’t come to bring peace

Lastly, remember that Jesus did not come to bring peace on earth, but that those who believe in Him will be hated by even those unbelieving in their own households.

“Do not think that I came to bring peace on earth. I did not come to bring peace but a sword. “For I have come to ‘set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law’; “and ‘a man’s enemies will be those of his own household.’ … “He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for My sake will find it.”

Matthew 10:34-36, 39 NKJV

Peace and happiness are not dependent on circumstances, but on our relationship with God. Jesus calls us to a life of denying self and losing our life. Maybe when you received Christ as Lord and Savior you were told that God would make you happy, take away your problems, or fix your finances. Sometimes, as in my situation, He lets you be unhappy, give you more problems, and takes away your job to grow you, rely on Him more, and to make you more mature in Christ. I wouldn’t trade that for all the riches in the world. Even in the midst of trials and challenges, we can find peace and joy knowing that we are loved and cared for by our Heavenly Father, and becoming more like Christ every day. Jesus never promised that He would take our trials and tribulations away, but promised that He would walk through them with us. He never leaves us or forsakes us (Deuteronomy 31:6, 8; Joshua 1:5; Hebrews 13:5). He has given us His Spirit to guide and help us in every time of need. You are not alone in your struggles; God, the Holy Spirit is always with you.

Jesus is fully God, and fully man.

Read the book of Hebrews. Not only is the Holy Spirit with us, but Jesus sympathizes with our weaknesses and intercedes for us on our behalf because even though He is fully God, He is also fully man. Jesus was tempted yet was sinless. He suffered, yet learned obedience from what He suffered. He felt grief, pain, loss, and love for His fellow man. He knows what you go through because He went through it also.

If you are struggling as a Christian, my prayer for you is that you find peace in this. Rejoice with joy that is inexpressible because you are a child of God (1 Peter 1:8). Be obedient to what God called you to do and use the gifts the Holy Spirit gave you. When you answer the call, you thrive like a fish in water.

Guzik, David. “Study Guide for Ephesians 6.” Blue Letter Bible. 6/2022. Web. 5 Sep, 2023. https://www.blueletterbible.org/comm/guzik_david/study-guide/ephesians/ephesians-6.cfm.

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